Saturday, July 30, 2011

Peaks, Valleys: the manic-depressive nature of writing

Other writers have commented on the weird bipolarity of this craft. The first part of many projects, especially involving interviews or research, is a bit of a slog, but as you work and work and work to get a project done, and the energy and excitement of it increases, until you find yourself at some weird crazy peak of creativity - it feels great, is a highly stimulating state to be in. Then you finally finish the piece and stick it out into the world, proud that it's done. That feels pretty good in its own right, and (if you're like me) you might spend a day or two tweaking it and re-reading it and just feelin' good about yourself for having DONE something. But you might also notice around that time - with no other project ongoing, to keep your energies up - that, actually, you're well-primed for a reward. Money, fame, appreciation, a blowjob - SOMETHING. Even a nice thank you note, a bit of positive feedback, increased hits on the blog, being Tweeted or "liked" or recommended or so forth.

As often as not, nothing happens, and you're left with nothing but the prospect of the next slog down the line, with echoing questions in the background: why did I bother? What did I expect? What's the point? Why am I doing this?

If it's an article you're getting paid for, when you get the cheque, it might take care of some of those problems, but I'm still doing a shitload of stuff I'm NOT getting paid for, dig? Occasionally it pays off - in new friendships, cool perks, interesting follow-ups, new insights into the stuff I've been writing about...

...but sometimes it's just a grind...

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Allan, it is obvious you need to return to PGIC-Vancouver (new name, new owner - google a bit). The torture of the job will put it all back in perspective.
- Karen

Allan MacInnis said...

There are actually days when I *miss* that place, believe it or not...

Anonymous said...

http://www.thenewswire.ca/archives?tnwarchive2=release_id%3D4107
somebody, not me, is making a whole lot of money. wish I'd known - uh well. of course, really, who knew what when is the question.
And oh yes, Robin Perelle, Xtra West editor, is dating a guy. She was nervous about coming out with this but the community apparently are fine with it
strange days indeed.
- Karen