Soramimi Ni-Ban

I haven't laughed this hard in awhile, but it takes some time to get to the humour in it, if you don't speak Japanese. I speak just enough that I can appreciate how ridiculous all this is, how delightful.

If you haven't read my original post, in which I enthuse about the Japanese art of mishearing song lyrics, do so. Thanks to the ever-playful Sumiyo (and Japanese Youtube videos - link here), I have a deeper appreciation for just how Soramimi works.

Dig: you're watching TV. There's a famous song, in SOME language other than Japanese, playing. There's a little movie - like a dramatic "rock video" -- illustrating what it SOUNDS like is being sung (in Japanese) to the casual Japanese viewer. As the key phrases ring out, illustrative Japanese subtitles appear below, presenting the misreading at hand. For example, some French song - God knows what the original lyrics are, as my Japanese is far better than my French and my Japanese isn't that good - is playing, and we see images of a woman's dress, her long hair, her purse. Then a phrase is sung, in French, that sounds remarkably - and I mean remarkably - like "Okama to sono otosan." We then see an image of a drag queen, whose clothes we've been examining in closeup, sitting on a bus stop bench beside an old man. "Okama to sono otosan" means something like, "the drag queen and that father." Or maybe "The drag queen and that old man."

This is NOT what the original lyric refers to, but hearing it thus creates a ripple of hilarity in the Japanese viewer, because it's really what it sounds like. Ha! The drag queen and that father! Ha!

It's funnier, trust me, if you try it with an English song. For example, there's a Def Leppard tune which has a chorus of, "Are you getting it? I'm a-getting it!" As the song plays, there are images of an older Japanese woman in a white dress walking on the beach, looking at the ocean and holding her stomach, a pained expression on her face. "I'm a-getting it," the subtitle reveals - I needed Sumiyo's help to read it - sounds like "Ama geri de!" (roughly, "because of the old fisherwoman's diarrhea). Not the usual theme of a rock video by far. For "Really getting it?" - the next line - it sounds, with some stretching, like "umi ni dere nee," a sort of slang expression meaning something like, "I can't work in the sea today." (They cheat a little on this one, I think). Then there's a line, " 'Coz I'm a getting it," which I do credit as sounding a little like, "Kesa mo geri de," meaning, "Also this morning, because of diarrhea..."). We fade out on an image of the old fisherwoman squatting behind a log...

No? That STILL isn't funny? Maybe it loses something in translation, or explication, or somewhere. Here's a final favourite from the video clip Sumiyo showed me: a Guns and Roses song with Axl shrieking, "I leave it all behind." This is accompanied with images of a somber room, where mourning might take place, and a tablet with writing on it; the subtitle flashes, "Aniki no ihai" - again, a bit of a stretch, but not as much as you might think, if you hear it; it's a plausible cross-cultural mondegreen. "Aniki no ihai" means, "My brother's Buddhist funeral memorial tablet." (It isn't that funny yet, but wait). The camera tracks up, and we are treated to a framed photograph of a mean-looking Japanese man in a tacky suit and sunglasses. (It helps at this point to know - Takeshi Kitano fans can vouch for this - that "aniki" doesn't just mean brother in the familial sense, but also is a term of affection that gangsters use.) Just as the camera arrives at the photo, Axl - I swear to God - screams, "Yakuza!" Which the subtitles spell out. I have NO IDEA WHAT HE COULD HAVE BEEN SAYING; Sumiyo wanted to know, but EVEN TO ME, in this context, it really sounds like he's saying, "Yakuza," which riffs off the "aniki no ihai" in a bizarre way, shifting its meaning to, "My gangster bro's Buddhist funeral memorial tablet!"

Hahahahaha! My gangster bro's Buddhist funeral memorial tablet! In a Japanese song! Hahahaha!

You know who I have to compile this shit for, don't you? TOM FUCKING HOLLISTON!!! (He apparently was commenting to a crowd during one of Nomeansno's recent European dates that "Nick Drake," if you say it aloud, sounds like a stolen garden implement).

Thanks to Sumiyo, I'm a-getting it!

Misheard Lyrics Japanese-style; in which I discover soramimi kashi

Bear with me for a moment, I need to set this up: since his name came up in a recent interview I did with Mike Watt - see the next two Nerves -- I've been readin' up on John Fogerty and considering seeing his Thursday show at Deer Lake Park. Not really my thing, but Watt also has me listening to Petra Haden's acapella cover version of the whole of The Who Sell Out, and I'm finding it utterly delightful, beyond what I could have imagined; it's been a long time since I was a Who-lovin' youth (or a CCR-lovin' youth), since both bands were kind of eclipsed and replaced by punk, for me, which made listening to the status quo kinda uncool, particularly since its representatives tended to beat punks up. Having set aside certain albums of my early youth, I am occasionally now delighted and surprised to discover that some of it still holds something for me. Hence Fogerty - might be an interesting event, actually. Or it might not.

ANYHOW, I was reading the Wikipedia entry on Fogerty, and there discovered that there is actually a name for misheard song lyrics (and such), the "mondegreen" (a whole archive of which, in the world of rock, can be found here). Apparently Fogerty, amused by a particular mishearing, sometimes now renders "There's a bad moon on the rise," in his song "Bad Moon Rising," as "There's a bathroom on the right" in concert. Amusing enough - and do explore the Wiki mondegreen entry linked above - but what really delighted me was learning, by following the links, about soramimi kashi - a related Japanese media pastime involving lyrics that, when misheard as Japanese, are very funny indeed. For instance: "You Give Me All I Need," by the Scorpions, sounds quite like "雪見オナニー" (yukimi onani) - or, "watching snow and masturbating."

This pleases me a great deal, as does the rendition of the Beatles "I Want to Hold Your Hand" as
"アホな放尿犯" (Aho na hōnyōhan), which translates into "Idiotic public urination" (something more common in Japan than Canada). Likable Japanese girlblog here on the topic, with some further links; the only really delightful ones I've bumped into thus far are from the Wikipedia article (For example, apparently Filippa Giordano's "Casta Diva" has a chours of "A noi volgi, a noi volgi," which to a Japanese can't but be heard as "あの イボ痔 あの イボ痔" (Ano iboji, ano iboji) - or "Um, I have hemorrhoids, um, I have hemorrhoids."

Anyone else got any good'uns?