3am health notes

Photo taken two days ago, Oct 18; friends have joked on Facebook that I look like I just got back into general population: "You should see the other guy."

3am - isn't there a Guadalcanal Diary song about this time? I've been listening to them an awful lot lately. Never made it out to see them live, was shocked to read that around the time of my renewed interest in them - securing cheap vinyl of two of their albums that I didn't have, spinning the hell out of Jamboree in particular (how could I have forgotten "Cattle Prod?"), guitarist Jeff Walls was, in fact, dying (Wikipedia is a bit obscure here but pancreatic cancer was a factor. Somehow, a ton of people whose music I've been spinning heavily these last few years - Zappa, Zevon, Guy Clark - died of cancer... lot of it goin' round...).  

Anyhow, Erika's still in bed. I got up to pee then quietly, using my cellphone light, made my way to the kitchen to get yoghurt and probiotics, taking a generous amount of both to re-forest my gut culture, decimated by the antibiotics I'm on for my throat infection (novelty gift idea: instead of "I Voted" buttons, make, "I Sharted" buttons). I have begun to have a sore throat, as well, and a bit of a stuffy nose, but they've lingered so long, without fever or other full-on signs of illness - no fever, aches, weakness - that I have no idea what to make of them. Did I catch COVID in hospital, perhaps when my neighbour/ roommate had her whole family on the other side of the curtain, none of them masked? (People mask in the hallways but not in their rooms, even though these are shared). Is it merely a mild cold? Is it just all down to tissues being aggravated by smoke inhalation? (We're in the midst of an unusually hot and dry October that has spawned several wildfires, and the air quality has been lousy enough that you can see smoke hanging in the air around you if you step outside). I have tested twice. I've told a friend we could do a belated Thanksgiving thing on Friday, if I don't test positive. I'm also supposed to see my cancer specialist, though I'm not thrilled about the idea of making him sick. He works very hard, six days a week, and his health is vital to the lives of his patients, including me. 

I might see if he'd prefer to do a phoner. 

Of course, speaking of cancer, one of the symptoms of my tongue cancer, both during the original outbreak and then the recurrence, was mild coldlike symptoms that lingered pretty much exactly like these are doing. My specialist, when I saw him a couple of Saturdays ago, prior to going into the hospital, seemed pretty sure that this was recurrent cancer. Draining a cup of pus out of me is no proof that he was wrong, alas: one can have both cancer and infection at the same time. I mean, something set me off, in there. 

Not sure if I explained this below or not, but the most important thing about this infection from my current standpoint is that it's going to delay my PET Scan by some weeks. My specialist was talking about scheduling one of those on second to last appointment (I wrote below that that was Sept. 25th, but it was actually the 24th - he sees patients on Saturdays) - that before I had noticed any lump, a sheer precautionary measure. They give you a radioactive dye in a sugar solution and make you sit still for a chunk of time before scanning you, because apparently cancer likes sugar and absorbs it faster than the rest of your tissues, causing it to glow with the radiation on the scanner or such (strictly a layperson's explanation, here, but you get the idea). But - one of the doctors who attended me last week explained - the infection and inflammation will heat up the area and make an accurate reading impossible for weeks. 

Giving the cancer time to spread.

I wonder if it bothers my specialist, if he thinks about it: he had wanted, initially, for me to have radiation and chemo. The radiation and chemo doc at the Cancer Agency balked, however - it would be too debilitating for an ailment so local - and there was apparently a discussion of my case in a Zoom call with a bunch of other specialists where it was decided to go with the surgical option, which left me talking like I do, now. If I'd understood how deeply my speech would be impacted I'd have probably argued for the radiation option - because friends of mine who had radiation for tongue cancer DO have miserable side-effects, from a lack of saliva to problematic dentistry, but AT LEAST THEY SPEAK CLEARLY. 

Plus now if this is a recurrent cancer - I mean, maybe radiation would have stopped it? The doctor could only harvest so many lymph nodes when he dissected my neck. If he left one behind that was just starting to mutate... it could have been growing and spreading since last December. 

And it probably won't be until next December - two months from now - that they can actually do a PET Scan on me (that's what the ENT at VGH said, anyhow; we were looking at eight weeks for the area to calm down). 

3:40am. Yoghurt done, pills taken, next antibiotics due for 9am. Should I even try to go back to sleep? 

Dunno.