Arrghh...

Fucking financial stress. Getting paid $19 an hour at the same job where I once made $40. I needed the money for a root canal and could start right away, so I couldn't pass it up... but it's not really a living wage! I get about $1600 a month once deductions are accounted for. Rent is $620, phone is $60, cable internet is $60, hyrdro averages out to $30 or $40 a month, my Visa bill minimum is $150, and commuting (if I take the West Coast Express from Maple Ridge) is $244 (!). Add that all up and I have around $300 a month for food, neverminding anything extra (and I do like my extras). Trying to wean myself off being helped by my Mom - I've been as dependent on her as she has on me the last few years - but I'm experiencing a moment of insecurity and anxiety as to how I'm going to get by. Even the little bit of extra money I pull in from writing and such is a drop in the bucket... Hauling Mom's groceries around downtown Maple Ridge in my backpack, I have to admit to feeling grim and impoverished... True that I splurged on a few Blu-Rays and LPs this month, and that I probably shouldn't have, but even without that indulgence, things are feeling pretty tight...